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Posts Tagged ‘Southerners is awesome’

Oh, Look, Another Video.

Posted by idetest on May 31, 2011

 

If this video doesn’t make sense to you then chances are we wouldn’t be friends. Just sayin’.

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Best TV of 2010

Posted by idetest on December 29, 2010

Exactly what it says on the box kiddos

1. Downton Abbey. Yes despite the fact that it all went a bit skewiff as it went on and began to look more and more like every other British drama about posh people with lots of ‘funny’ moments where they played jaunty music in the background and everyone smirked (a la Mornach of the Glen. Yeesh. There’s a show no one should admit to ever watching. Even though him what wrote THIS starred in THAT. Ew.), it was still able to ram it home in a few ways.

Kudos for the gay character, who was an evil Machiavellian bastard and well done for getting Maggie Smith in period costume, which should be required for every TV show. However, less well done for being in general too nice: servants takin’ all sorts of liberties, class warfare played as ‘rich girl in impolite, cute male servant gets upset, rich girl apologises, they have steamy eye make outs.’ Yes, I’m sure in 1914 a good decade before the first set of miner’s strikes which was one of the first times the plight of the working class had ever been shown they were already well on their way to Blair’s dream of ‘everyone being middle class now’.

3.5/5

2. Misfits. Rude, crude, lewd, and all round wonderful. Misfits‘ second season doesn’t make sense if you think about why on earth it all happened; every time there’s a big plot development it’s all over at the end of the episode because of time travel. Like why the hell did future Simon come back? How did he come back? How did him and Alicia get together when they had to turn back time to save everyone therefore stopping her from telling him?

Whatevs, the main reason to watch it is the one lines and amazing chavvy brilliance (note; this is the only time the words ‘chav’ and ‘brilliance’ will be together in a sentence on this website. Unless the word ‘murder’ is in the middle.) complete with Lauren Socha (her what plays Kelly) put on a gangsta accent which makes her brilliant lines ever better.

4/5

2010 Christmas special

2.5/5

3. True Blood.

Sookie

Everyone thought Sookie's secret was she was telepathic. No one knew it was really that she was from Naenae.

Even though here in the UK we still are yet to get Series 3, because…because, well the British don’t trust anything that came out after 1954 and so therefore move at a glacial pace, I did however get to see series 2. So that’s what I’m judging on. Despite the fact that show has so many plots and characters and a fairly rigid formula of starting the next episode/series exactly where the last finished it does manage to pack a fair bit in. Even though at some points you’d just like them to slow it down and let us revel in it.

But whatevs, Maryann was a psycho hell-demon/Greek goddess thing. Awesome. Southern Religious Freaks got mocked and satirised. Awesome. Sookie…is from Lower Hutt. Ew. Eric the Swedish Viking Vampire. Awesome.

4/5

4. Sherlock. Now I must say even though this show was highly enjoyable I found myself unable to overlook many of its major faults – it’s just too British to really be as slick and cool as it wants to be. I’m not saying they need to have random explosions everywhere and bring in ‘zany’ characters but it just seems to be too big for its budget and the constraints of the BBC. As long as the budget has been ramped up for the second season and the denouement done slightly better I see no reason why I shan’t fall in love with it.BC

3.5/5

Snooki 5. All reality TV anywhere, anytime! Admit it, you love it. Whether it’s Snooki and her pouf, the real housewives of Nebraska having a cat fight and yelling out “Prostitution Whore!” at each other, or one of the British entries (Young, dumb and Living off Mum, The Only Way is Essex, Snog, Marry, Avoid) reality Tv constantly excels itself in its brilliance and originality. Long may it reign!

5/5

Honourable Mentions

Mongrels: A hilarious satire with puppets playing urban wildlife. I eagerly await Series 2.

Glee: Brilliant songs, witty one liners, terrible, terrible plots that scar the mind.

Upstairs Downstairs: It got good. Mostly because episode 2 gave us Jews and fascists.

Worst TV of 2010- where to start?

X Factor

Anything hosted by Vernon Kay

Two and a half Men

Strictly Come Dancing

Most evening fare on BBC1 (It’s a sad state of events when ITV1 is offering more drama than the beeb)

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I Think I Know Her

Posted by idetest on December 21, 2010

Admit it. You’re dying to go and see her, aren’t you?

OKRRRRR!!!!

Posted in Sheer brilliance | Tagged: , , | 1 Comment »

Makes me want to do meth.

Posted by idetest on June 5, 2010

Gays. Meth. A white t-shirt similar to one I own. ANNABETH SCHOTT! I mean APRIL RHODES! I mean my favourite midget, Christian, southern, blonde, all-dancing, all-singing broadway freak of nature! In one video. Bestill my beating heart.

Now neither of the countries I have lived in have, to my knowledge, showed Intervention but I know of it and it’s amazingness. It’s not quite as good as Hoarders. Cos Lindsay guest stars in that with her ‘allergies’ (no Gretchen Weiner though. Strange-aren’t they friends again yet?)

Anyway. Enjoy while you’re looking for that broken lightbulb to get your Friday night started.

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This makes my blood boil

Posted by idetest on June 3, 2010

Other things:

62. Twilight. There are many reasons to hate this next entry; my reasons are not particularly complicated and are as follows:

Goodness me, remember when this came out? How we laughed...

A) Stephanie Meyer is a Mormon. Mormons are intrinsically evil and have caused death and destruction for the thousands of years they have wandered the deserts (plus they have horns and drink blood). Never mind that something ridiculous like a 1/3 of her income and of all other Mormons goes to the church, so every time a Nebraskan housewife takes a long relaxing bubble bath dreaming of Edward and going to her special place while reading Moonraker, or whatever the bloody title is Stephanie Meyer goes ‘Kaching!’, so does the Mormon church as well so now they can fund more anti-abortion campaigns, conversion therapy courses and of course lovely things such as Prop 8. Fuck you all. (Interesting the only acceptable Mormon is Meryl Streep in Angels in America.)

B) They are so appallingly written it’s embarrassing to be near it. Shit literature is not a new phenomenon and long may it continue, I say. The world needs it’s Mills and Boon and Jeffrey Archers to keep the masses content for their bath special time. However, when all you do is open your The saw us (as I’m sure she calls it) so she can come up with new words for ‘sparkly’ and ‘vibrator material’ you are too shit to be allowed to write.

C) They make feminist want to cry. I’m sorry, but the scene where Edward take out a part of Bella’s car engine so she can’t leave without his permission? The scene where her father congratulates Jacob for coming onto her EVEN AFTER SHE IS UPSET AND SLAPS HIM AND THEN NEARLY BREAKS HER HAND!??? What kind of Father…no, breathe.  (Never mind when I read it the first time I read it I was so sick of Edward I was like ‘Yes, let the ethnic minority ravage you and shut up about the whiny dead bastard).

This isn’t even mentioning the fact that she completely alienates herself from all her friends to be with him (but it’s ok because she was an outsider anyway who didn’t really enjoy having friends …so that’s normal) and doesn’t mind Edward being her sole focus in the world. Which is starting to sound like a made for TV movie plot about domestic violence. I can’t wait for Twilight book 5: Bella keeps walking into doors. In fact I’m sure at some point Edward does utter ‘you made me do this!’

D) She had Edward say he had to bite a pillow while having sex. Without knowing anything about how this could be taken. This woman needs to get out of New Mexico and meet some flamers.

E) The plot came to her in a dream after she’d been watching a TV show ( I believe it was Angel)…so she dreams of a story where a girl and a vampire can’t be together after watching a TV show where a vampire is upset because his one true love (a girl) and he cannot be together. Whether or not this is true I cannot be arsed googling. But still.

F) It gives all other Vampire shows and books a bad name. I’m sorry but I’m an unabashed fan of all things Vampire. When Buffy used to stake them in the Sunnydale cemetery on a school night? I was there. When Bill and Sookie had their first weird Wuthering Heights Cathy on the moors/Sookie in the bayou in a nightdress shagathon? I was there. When Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt were soooo gay for each other in the 90’s? I was there. When…well you get the picture.

G) Horrible awful geeky socially awkward 40 year old virgin types look down on pop culture because of it. While in the movies the other day a preview for Ellipsis or whatever it’s called (incidentally Meyer’s favourite writing ….technique) came on and they started laughing at it. How dare they laugh at something! They had tapered jeans on and ugly facial hair! Glasses! Long hair! A backpack while being in their 30’s! It’s destroyed the equilibrium.

H) The town of Forks, Washington is now going through a tourist boom. I have no idea why as because Meyer GOOGLED it. That was the extent of her research ‘Wot’s da rainiest place in real America? Nowhere where fags or blacks live. They don’t count’ so therefore the town is never mentioned in any detail. There is no mention of a town square, a main street, some local landmark, what the high school looks like, what Bella’s street looks like, NOTHING because Meyer had no idea. She mentions the nearby towns of La Push and Port Angeles. But we never hear of them in great detail either.

She spends more time describing Italy when they run off there for a few chapters than she does her main setting.  And has Jacob go to Seattle to try and pick up more teenage girls to join her cult of teen angst and mentions something about a mall if I recall correctly (I probably don’t. I drank to cope with these books.) For all of a page. That’s about as much detail as we get. She mentions mountains and forests a plenty. And meadows (Meyer loves a good meadow…there must be meadows in the bible). But nothing else.

I) Bella is an intellectual. She reads Jane Austen, loves Shakespeare and Wuthering Heights is her favourite novel. Because so many 17 year old girls who know shit about nothing and have to go live with their Republican (I’m guessing/projecting)fathers in Bumfuckvile are all about their dead 19th century novelists and renaissance era playwrights. Do they not get Glee in this place?

Also Bella hates TV if I remember through the bourbon induced haze. Ah, yes the only teenager in the world who does so. That’s probably why she’s so special she gets to be bitten by a fruity vajazzled (look it up) dead guy.

More will follow.

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I don’t detest this. In fact I’m salivating.

Posted by idetest on June 2, 2010

Vampire Bill! Sookeh! The other people who I don’t care so much about! THE SWEDISH SEX VAMPIRE!

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